Z in lock down

Posted By

Sleepy_Z

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Published On Thursday, August 6, 2020
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This blog has been tipped 6 times

As stated in the extract, the last couple months have been hard. Loosing the ability being able to do things that had become normal, has impacted almost everyone. And although it isn't over I feel in myself that a a new equilibrium has been reached that will likely govern how aspects of my life take shape for quite some time. And so I wanted to write this to talk about how being a pup has impacted my experiences.

Just before the lockdown began I had attended my first event. With another approaching I was very aware of the virus and felt very unsure of the risks of going to it. I did not go out of worry. Although I believe the event may have been cancelled aswell. I was very dissapointed that I was not going as I had become quite excited to continue getting myself out there.
Until my first event, posting blogs and messaging a handful of people on this website had been my only connection to the pup world  beyond my front door. It was there I was nudged towards telegram. On which I have continued to talk to some people I met. I've also made some new friends. Over the months that followed I fell in and out of my pup self. With weeks where every day I would wear my hood for as much time as I could. And others where being a pup barely crossed my mind. There was such a large spell of time where I barely connected to my pup self that I almost felt as if I didn't identify with it anymore. It aligned with a period of pleasant events in my human life, making me feel like I am only using pup when things are bad. 
Throughout this time though the friends I made as a pup stayed loving and chatty. They were always happy to talk to me about however I was feeling, just as I was to them. Naturally I have had this to an extent with the firends I made as a person, but not to the same degree, and not with the same consistancy. Everyone has continued to make me feel happy and welcome.
Gradually I started going back into the headspace again although things have been relatively positive for me overall, allowing for me to achieve a very pleasant balance between being a human and pup, taking quality time for each. 

In this time I have got to know a couple specific pups quite well and can't help but ponder if and how those friendships may evolve. It makes me excited for the future, when I can maybe meet them. I have also begun considering how I want to grow as a pup, building my own look, buying new gear that matches my growing self image. I am excited for all the steps to come. And that positive outlook has certianly bled into my human side.

I hope that this aligns with other peoples experiences. Having friends supporting them through unneasy times. Be that via pup play or otherwise. And I hope that I can continue to make new friends. I try and be friendly and easy to talk to so feel free to message me.
*Many wags and licks as always.*
Z.

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